Self Forgiveness 26th Jan

Ok - these last couple of days has been a bit turbulent - as in revealing to me some points within me that I need to clear. Not easy to push through some of these, but I have to otherwise I will simply not be applying myself so I push and push myself no matter what.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel the need to defend any of my self forgiveness applications to anyone, this is my process to birth self as all as one and equal - hence no separation

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted any reactions within me whatsoever no matter from whom and regarding what since any reactions, thoughts , emotions and feelings are of mind and are illusions - not real

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget that the perception of the lack of understanding from another being simply is because of difference in programming - in reality we are all one and equal

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to get frustrated with Trey for not realizing that my self forgiveness applications are reflecting me and hence I apply myself accordingly to transcend that point

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to even contemplate not publishing my brutal self honesty applications out of fear of others reactions , perceptions or misunderstandings since it is all based on mind if any reactions arise within

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to contemplate being subject to any manipulations by mind - I am NOT my mind. I am here - I am me - I am life as all as one and equal in every breath of every moment - it is impossible for me as who I really am to become or feel manipulated

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to even contemplate not putting out ALL the forgiveness applications i wrote down last night regarding this issue, because I allow my mind to tell me that "I am done with this particular issue and have done enough self forgiveness" and also because of some underlying fear I am allowing regarding this - I do not accept or allow my mind to direct me in any way what so ever

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to become frustrated with Trey for taking my self honesty and self forgiveness applications personally and hence allow himself to be of mind - instead of applying himself and apply forgiveness so that he can transcend this point as I am applying me to transcend it

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to separate me from Trey - we are all one and equal in oneness and equality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel wrongly accused for something that was not intentionally meant to hurt anyone in that forgetting that only minds can get its feelings hurt - who we really are cannot become hurt or feel

Till here no further:
I do not allow or accept any feelings, thoughts, emotions, fears, judgement, separation, worries, concerns, regret, guilt in my life or within me - that is not who I am.
I am life as all as one and equal. I remain here in every moment of every breath. Stable - constant - eternally, as all as one and equal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that I was asking too much of my daughter today when wanting her to stay at the party alone with her brothers, wanting her to stay there and not be so dependant on me, hence feeling regret and guilt about her tears not realizing that this is a mind CONstruct that is in placement for enslavement to the systems as to remain and keep us in control by fears

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to fear, regret and feel guilty - in that forgetting that these are all mind constructs and hence not real

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that there won't be enough money for some major bills this month and in that forgetting that I am defining me by money by allowing that fear instead of realizing that it is a manifestation created to install fear and to keep me enslaved and controlled by the system

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted myself to dread what is ahead in my process without realizing that I allowing mind to control and influence me and hence support mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get irritated by Anita after her coming to the party even though her kids have got a tummy bug - which to me was irresponsible since there are the potential of lots of children becoming ill - not realizing and totally forgetting in my self deceptiveness that these illneses are system based, and is of support to remove systems
and that i am as guilt as any human being or allowances within our so called reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel guilty for the mice that Simba has killed - and for getting angry at myself because I realise that these mice gets killed and suffer due to mine and all human beings allowances of our own creation of separation

I forgive myself that I have allowed and accepted my mind to tell me that certain males are attractive and potential boyfriend material instead of immediately stopping any such thoughts since they are of mind and totally illusionary

Till here no further. I do not accept and allow my mind to direct me, place any thoughts or feelings into my head of any kind. I direct me. I am here.
I do not allow my mind to have any influence on me what so ever.